What is the worst thing that can happen on Halloween

In your first year at school.
Dad is coming to your class to volunteer.
You've got a cool costume
and managed to wrangle your siblings into being appropriate accessories.


Answer is:






Not sure what to make of it... he had this happen before... and was fine within hours. Here is hoping he wakes up bright eyed and healthy!
I don't want to be the one to tell him he can't go to school!

Happy Halloween?
ugh.



*Went to school feeling okay.
Threw up by 9:30.
home by ten...
bah humbug...

let it snow, let it snow, let it snow....

This is Halloween halloween halloween... this is halloween!

And rather frightening really.

Your Unique Costume is Tassle Twirling Tessie

Sexy? Maybe not... but definitely eye catching!

What Totally Unique Halloween Costume Should You Wear?

You Are

A Robo Pumpkin Face You would make a good pumpkin cyborg.

What's Your Pumpkin Face?

and perhaps most frightening... ahem as if we can get worse than the costume... I'm frightened beyond words on that one.

Halloween Horoscope for Capricorn

Your friends see a whole other side of you on Halloween - brash and bold. You make be reserved and conservative most other days, but on the 31st... look out! Costume suggestions: A stripper or naughty priest / nun Signature Halloween candy: M & M's

What's Your Halloween Horoscope?

Going to curl up with Jack the pumpkin king and enjoy halloween for sure... in the warmth of my home. Nothing like a snowstorm to herald All Hallows Eve.

What is with MY yard?

Okay, I'm done with being a nice neighbor. DONE DONE DONE!
This afternoon I'm going to see what can be done to my yard to keep out the cat on the one side and the dog on the other! I mean really! If it weren't for the fact that I have to have a clear path for the stroller... I'd pile the snow up high to keep that yipping little rat out of my yard.
What kind of owners are you, to allow your animal to roam into your new neighbors yard?
Why is your animal allowed to wander into my yard and do it's things... I'm sure I'd get in trouble for taking my chocolate lab and allowing him to do the same on their yards. Then again those yards are pretty pathetic... but still. Is it "okay" because it is a small animal? Does that make it any better?
The resounding answer is


NO!


Shit is shit
and cat urine is killing the bushes... and they NEED TO GROW thick enough to keep the cat from sitting under the bird feeder...
*I must give credit where it is due. The cat is at least tethered/collared and leashed. At. All. Times.

I've tried to be nice and shoo the dog back into its yard (I don't trust it not to bite the kids!)... but the owner just smiles and says that the previous owners used to let it run through the yards...
I
AM
NOT
THE
PREVIOUS
OWNER
.

What is with Blogger?

Things are finally getting posted a day or two later!!!
Bizarre.
Saturday was delightful. The only moment of sadness was laying in bed remembering how long it was before she came home again. I checked on her a few more times that was probably necessary, had the monitor on full blast... the usual if I've had a bad day.
Time change is not going well. We've been up for hours.... ugh ugh ugh.
And yet, we get to keep them up even later tonight.
Have mercy.

Still holding on tight to you ...


*mama will try to respect your halloween costume wishes from now on.... this year you are stuck as an accessory to your brother. Sorry kiddo.

Nqmds birth day

A few people have asked if we are doing anything special tomorrow.
We aren't having a party, just a cake and maybe a balloon or two for her brothers amusment.
For the most part I would just want to thank my midwives for being so calm and amazing and quite literally saving her precious little life.
insert time for me to get tissue and wipe up tears here...

I'm going to spend the day remembering what I did.
Having Shalyn phone me in the middle of the night and say it won't be long now... snort. It was pretty much 24 hours from that call that I finally got to hold her =)
Phoning the amazing techie friend who squeeee'd in delight at the prospect... and her insistence that it would be out shortly.... ha ha ha ha ha! Not all of us are blessed with those six hour labours sigh... What is an amazing techie friend to do? Why she went shopping with her crazy aunt who was visiting for clothes, girl clothes... because it was going to be a girl... no doubt about it! grin
The dog escaping the yard, without his collar.
The gal on from the city animal control expressing her shock that I had to stop through a contraction and was not at the hospital yet.
The College of Midwives rep, who called to ask if I was still coming on Tuesday... then quietly asking how I knew baby would be out by then... cue contraction.
The chuckle of my midwife watching me in the tub... and quietly asking why I didn't think the contractions were 'doing anything of interest' when they were lasting over a minute?
Being irritated when What Not to Wear was not ON! cue transition
Being more frightened than I've ever been in my entire life... but not sure why.
Then once she was born, mulitplying that fear by thousands.

I'm having a really hard time trying to understand why I wasn't more upset. I just sat on the couch. I got myself something to eat (yes, I did get strung up for that from midwife and the doula). I called friends and said she was okay....
Why wasn't I a complete wreck? I'm pretty sure I remember crying at some point.
I should chalk it up to the calm people around me.
I'm pretty sure I'm just trying to wrap my brain around why I am such a wreck now, but not then.

So it will be cake and reminissing.
Wish I could take a piece to the two women who were witness to her birth... (and a slice to Dreya too for putting up with me not being a good doula patient at the time ;-)!)
I'll lift my glass of wine and toast to C &A ... as I do almost every time I look at her.

I'd like a pony and a waffle and can we try this "dip" stuff the boys keep demanding? Can we? It's my birthday right?
*maple syrup

Lot of rage goin on here...

Birthday card for nqmd dads last name.
As a note... nqmd does not have dads last name.
I wrote a rather scathing comment to husband about this...

Title of the e-mail was nqmd husbands last name (yeah he would have been scared to open that one!)

Inside was this.

Got a birthday card from insert grandparent names here
IF YOU WANT TO IGNORE THE WHOLE ISSUE OF HER NAME PERHAPS YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE THROWN SUCH A VERY, VERY NASTY LANGUAGE HERE MISERABLE SNIT OVER IT WHEN SHE WAS BORN LAST YEAR!

Why is it that they can't respect what WE, her parents, have chosen for her name? She has dads last name as a middle name (just as the boys have mine as a middle name too), even if she decided to change her name if she gets married.... she is stuck with the thing forever!

They pulled me aside four days post c/s to get assurances that monster #1 didn't have a hyphenated last name.

"Oh good. We were worried that was the case. Why did you even bother with your name?"

Luckily the stupid cousins baby has the boyfriends last name and one of his grandmothers name for her middle name. Whew. At least someone is following the rules in that family huh?

Speaking of which here is a question for all the moms. IF your under year old child was quite sick (pneumonia and other bronchial infectious things) and was hospitalized. Would you go home for the overnight stay? One child. One parent working, formula fed kid....
My answer is that I wouldn't have left. Maybe I'm too protective?
Anyways, the child ended up with a medical issue happening to it and now everyone is up in arms about it ... Why weren't the nurses more attentive etc...

Ummmm lets get the numbers straight. One nurse to 8 children... that night it was 14 kids per nurse on the ward. Well, silly cousin get used to it. Because even if your child makes it to a year in that toxic home of yours... she is going to be sick for the rest of her life. Nice to hear you are trying to bring another one of them into the world.... have you noticed yet that he didn't propose over the first dramatic birth (SNORT) and I have doubts he will over this next one... seeing as he isn't even working at all now.
And I'm pissy over a name on a card that started with the inlaws not speaking with me until Christmas, then not again for another three months thereafter....
I'm the bad one, don't you know!

Closing with a pleasant note of going for Coffee... okay hot chocolate, carrot muffin and milkshake with a friend I haven't seen since the summer. That was LOVELY! We commiserated on the lack of finances... for the rest of our lives... =) Must do this more often.
Still drooling with anticipation of getting to see a neato birth video with the client/friend... once I get my butt out to see her...
Lawyers are suitable concerned now that I've contacted Canada Post and they are caught in the "we didn't send it by registered mail" folly.
It's Thursday. Which means ER... Yeah, raving lunatic time for mama, depending on the content.

This n' that deux

I'm not feeling coherent enough to make a post worthy of the time spent on spell checking it... let alone the grammar.
Do not start in on my lousy grammar okay? Thanks in advance.
Tinkerbell is complete.
Still need to do the hems on Peter Pan for monster #1.
Monster #2 has the hand me down crocodile suit...
Going to get the $5 deal at the local portrait studio. This is going to be too funny!
Nqmd decided last night that the stairs were worth trying to scale.
disastrous results ensued. I still get teary looking at her. Though the damage is very minimal in the light of day.... still ... must buy new gate. Usually just standing still causes pause and tears.
The lawyers are going to get a nasty little note in regards to sending the amount of money they did... NOT BY REGISTERED MAIL. I'm feeling slightly vindicated after talking to their higher authority this morning... ahhh rage subsiding.... somewhat.
Pregnant Carpool Partner... oh the rage is coming back. Husband coming home at seven thirty, her not informing him of this until halfway to work... arg... Must go on.
Okay sunshine. We have SUNSHINE!!!! WHEEEEEE
Won't last for long, but man is it nice!!!
Almost completely agreed to go to Sue's birth... she even said she'd pay me. What a hoot! Sorry but a dig about a doctors wife on an allowance would be too fun right now..... but I won't. tee hee. Just have that baby in a timely fashion before school gets back in. Oh and could you make it during the timeframe that my in-laws have invited themselves to stay with us over the holidays? PLEASE!!!
Must go and figure out what to make for supper now.
Pizza anyone?

Panic Attack from the depths

Took monster #2 and nqmd to pick up a few things at the grocery store...
As we were leaving and heading home, three ambulances and two of the SUV's came up behind us.
I pulled into a business parking lot.
I sobbed.
I hyperventilated.
I threw up.
I shook.
I could
not.
stop.
sobbing.


You'd think I'd be getting better by now.
I didn't let myself dare to believe she'd live to be a year... and here we are just a week shy of her birth day.

I pulled myself together enough to get us home in one piece.
I need to get working on the ptsd therapy stuff Sue's husband got me.
'Cause this is starting to get on my nerves. What's left of them, that is.

Just because I wasn't cranky enough...

An open letter to the estate lawyers involved with my grandmother will.

I live at XXX xxxxxxxxx street.
I gave you this new address three or four times now. Which you were kind enough to ignore my e-mails and not even hit the reply button as I requested... just so I knew you got it.
Because you informed me in June that things were finishing up and I was to expect mail from you soon.
It is October. Kinda late with that huh?

Supposedly you sent me a letter on the 5th of October.

You are not concerned that it did not arrive yet. You will not be bothering with it for a few weeks yet. This kind of delay is not uncommon.

Concern is called for.
Considering the people receiving the same mail less than 200 kms from you and the ones over 4000 kms from you received it on the 11th of October.... and I DID NOT... there is something wrong.
Note, there was a weekend and a statutory holiday in there.
Check the address, if you are charging 200 dollars for the ten minute phone call from my father, and 200 dollars for the seven minute call from me....

GET OFF YOUR ASSES AND FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU DID WRONG... DO NOT SPEAK TO ME LIKE SOME SNIVELING LITTLE BRAT... I AM CONCERNED THAT YOUR OFFICE IS USING EVERY SINGLE STALL TACTIC IN ORDER TO MAKE A HELL OF A LOT OF MONEY OFF OF THIS SINGLE WILL. BECAUSE THE PATHETIC LITTLE TOWN WHERE YOU ARE LOCATED DOESN'T GET A HECK OF A LOT OF BUSINESS, NOW DOES IT? I AM CONCERNED THAT THE CHEQUE WAS SENT TO THE WRONG ADDRESS, BUT FOR THAT 200 DOLLARS, YOU WON'T EVEN CRACK OPEN THE FILE AND DOUBLE CHECK FOR ME ON THE PHONE.

I despise these people.
IF you live in Ontario.... and need a lawyer... let me warn you away from this bunch. I fully expect that to do what they do does deserve payment. But after 18 months... it is getting a little old... and very costly.

200 dollars for a seven minute phone call.... Wonder if husband can start charging that with the irate parents who insist he should have called them back immediately, instead of ... you know...doing his job.

Eeep!

Seems that I should have remembered that we are having guests for dinner tomorrow night.
Whoops.
So, despite not having slept very well the last few nights.
A visit home, to do a few things that I know my father could do... if he was feeling better. And a chat with his physician which made me feel a bit better.
Monster #1 and the great adventure called projectile vomit
in a Dodge Grand Caravan
on the TransCanada Highway.
insert eeewwwww noises here
Monster #2 who seems to run on fast forward when everyone else is wanting to pause.
Nqmd... well, she is rapidly working her way towards an MD status...
yes, she is a monster daughter (note that leaves are yummy!)...

So despite all the fun and games in this monster house...
I am going to make a nice meal and hope that everything turns out just fine in time for the doorbell to ring!

EEEP!

Leaves are yummy.

This n' that

*I'd like to make it clear I hate this computer... this is my third time getting this post up.

The Tinkerbell costume for nqmd is pretty much done.
Someone shoot me now.
What started out as a nice simple little costume with leaves as an overlay of the skirt has gone awry. Very awry. I went into the fabric store for a simple little trim for the edge of the skirt (too lazy, bored to just do a rolled hem)... I walked out with beads and roses and fluffy wisps of a mossy looking stuff.
Someone shoot me now.

And because I just know everyone is dying to mercilessly mock me. I think we will need some new tights to complete the ensemble.

A friends daughter had her baby yesterday. Her first child was a four day ordeal finally ending with a spinal headache and a very sore nether region (child had a 15.5" head). She went overdue with this baby. I kept her mother in the know about inductions, how to irritate the little bugs out, general support. The only thing I begged of her mother is that she insist her daughter get a Bishops score before signing off on an induction...
Luckily mama went off to the hospital at midnight and delivered her baby by noon. Whew.
Felt like I was doing the doula thing online.
=)

Husband has made a point of getting to the home of CPC bright and early. Today he was treated to absolute silence and sulking.... as in she didn't even return the good morning proffered by husband this morning.
hee.
I'm evil, I know.

Must head to bed, before I lose this post too.
bah.
I hate saving after every other sentence! I started at 10:02... Double bah!

Inconvenient.

Well CPC has finally thrown me over the edge.
We were late getting to her home this morning (no later than she has shown up at ours on days she is picking up husband!).
She calls our cell phone cranky.
She starts in on husband as soon as he gets in her car...
"gee your late, like fifteen minutes late!"
"Sorry, the boys slept in a bit and it was hard to get them all out and ready."
"yeah, but I can't believe how late you were!"
"you know, pretty soon you are going to be experiencing how hard it is to get out of the house on time, and you'll only have one"... he is getting irritated after a full week of whining about other peoples kids drooling on her carpet and getting into her things.
"Well that is why my husband and I will not have three, so we don't have that problem."


Stunned silence...


Well CPC, mm needed the car today. You could have offered to pick me up, or I could do the best to get here when I did. And I did not feel like being reamed out after the stress of knowing I was late anyway."
"gee you don't have ...
"enough. I'm sorry I was late, we did the best we could and I'm sorry we inconvenienced you."

Silence the entire trip.

Silence still.

Can hardly wait for March.
At least then our children won't be a problem for her anymore.

On a positive note. All three monsters did well at the chiropractor.
We had a great lunch.
A good drive to get dad.
A good supper.
More pumpkins were bought.
Bath went off without a soaked floor.
Everyone is asleep at the moment....
Whoa....
guess my inconvenient problem children aren't so bad.
;-)

Wide awake...

As per usual... when do I out grow the whole insomnia thingy?
So here I am wide awake.
The wind is howling... oooh hey anyone remember Snoopy with the "it was a dark and stormy night"
Okay howling wind. Snow. Awake. Feeling almost back to normal after the poisoning.
What else.
Sarah has a new venture for the million dollars someone is going to have to come up with! C'mon it's a good cause. Go see.

Back?
Good. See isn't it a neat idea?! I LIKE IT! And correct me if I'm wrong here... because here comes a blanket statement that I'm not completely sure of

I believe that Sarah had more common sense when it comes to birthing in this day and age despite (here comes the blanket statement I'm not completely sure of) never having given birth herself....

I am making assumptions here... so I apologize if she has given birth and I have yet to catch on to the fact! One never knows in this day and age! So there we go. Sarah rocks on the whole birth scene.
I personally have never watched Greys Anatomy before this evening. Sue called and told me to. Thanks for aiding in my demise, waking my children and well... yeah. Another show I can chalk up to me raving at out loud.
I personally wouldn't re-write the ending... just make it a two parter as mom goes into a deep depression and requires medical intervention for her post partum depression aided by the post surgical depression aided by..... yeah you all see where this one is going right? No? Go back to Sarah here and she can spell it out for you.
Still with me?
Good.
Did I mention I'm awake? Have we noticed what time it is yet?
Wind is still howling.
I'm going to curl up on my cold, cold couch and try to close my eyes.
Tomorrow the monsters and I have to take Dad to the cranky pregnant carpool partners house, so we can have a car for the day. Do not get me started on the CPC... new levels of low have been reached. And I can barely even believe this person is going to be a parent in a few short months... I can only hope that the baby sleeps through the night, eats on a schedule and is able to let them have some "me time" when they want it. Of course I'll be a rabid green with jealousy! I'm still catching back episodes of The West Wing from when I had Monster #1 and didn't get to watch it from beginning to end-
Okay off to sleep... maybe.
My goal for this weekend is to nap, sew and nap some more. Luckily there is a spare bed beside the sewing area in the basement... Perhaps no one will notice if the sewing machine goes silent for an hour or so?

Think about it...

After four years of dating,
two years of engagement purgatory
and eight years of marriage...

Your wife is allergic to purple grapes.
Hence one of the reasons she has not drank red wine more than twice in the entire time you two have been an "item".

DO NOT GIVE HER FRUIT JUICE WITH PURPLE GRAPES IN IT.

It makes her sick.
Very sick.
Want to die sick.
And this all could have been prevented if the man had read the ingredients list...
Grumble, gripe, howl with rage between nausea induced heaves.

By the way, for those who are actually in wedded bliss.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TECHIE FRIEND AND HER HUSBAND!!!
Sorry! I forgot until I went to scribble on the calendar this evening.

Must have back up plan...

Because when one has been up all night vomiting what little is left of their innards... walking monsters to school and back.
Sucks.

I'm going to pass out on the couch now, with my puke bucket... because getting up for the 15 steps to the bathroom is too much this morning.

Also going to talk to neighbor across the street about monster #1 walking to school with her on occasions such as this.

Back to dying now.

Dear techie friend Jenn, I apologize if you phoned me back last night... I was becoming acquainted with the nice ceramic tile floor in the upstairs bathroom and chose to ignore anything that required leaving that floor.


*No, for those of you who "know me" there isn't a snowballs chance in Hell that I'm pregnant... And please note I still do not understand bulimia as a hobby despite my consumption of way too much food this past weekend.

A note from nqmd... cause mom keeps forgetting!

I've been chewing on things for a few months...


And I finally have teeth.
Mommy keeps forgetting to tell y'all.
Aren't my friends cute?
I can hardly wait to see them again next summer!

What I'm thankful for...

The inlaws deciding at the last minute to head home after all... whew.
The dishwasher!
Lindt chocolate on sale.
The costume for nqmd coming together without much of a hitch... knocking on wood!
Leftovers that should give us a few more meals!
"Neverstopmilk" commercials.
Monster #2 and his giggle... though it wasn't so pleasant that he'd picked up nqmd.
Nqmd being as resilient as she is.
Monster #1 baking.
Photos from friends.
My body allowing me to eat an incredible amount of blue cheese this afternoon.
Moving my neck without pain again... man that is a big one!
Time for bed.
Not sure what we'll do tomorrow. Think if the weather is good we'll hit a playground and picnic for lunch...

Gonna be a long haul....

This morning met husband at monster #1's morning class.
-had a run in with the most annoying parent, who wanted to talk about the "two way street" with the behavior of our children in that class...
two way street?
Your child is a holy terror, I've yet to see you discipline it in any way shape or form, including when it threw a hissy fit and smacked into a little girl two years ago, making her cry. YOU NEVER SAID A WORD TO YOUR CHILD, NOR DID YOU MAKE HIM APOLOGIZE.... If ever there was a moment.....

ahem.

We both said that our monster had to remember to keep his hands to himself and if someone was being naughty to just move away from them. Or tell them you don't like what is going on... same way we are asking him to cope with a rather affectionate classmate at school. The instructor was within earshot of this and made a point of telling us that monster #1 is doing REALLY well and that she is trying to keep this particular child away from him.....
Yo, mother of particular child. TAKE NOTE!
I spoke to mine about his behavior. I did not notice you doing so. Just wanted to share the blame? Fine. My monster got wound up while in the company of your child. Neither of them were behaving like the proper young monsters they should have been.
Lets work on it shall we?

SNORT.
*both parents of particular child are teachers... I weep at the thought.



Went out for an amazingly wonderful delicious dinner tonight!!!
Had my monsters somewhat behave....
"mummmmm I like supper"...
yeah kid, if you liked it so much why didn't you eat it?!
Can you hear the howls of frustration yet?

Got home to a message from the in-laws
-bringing their dog.
-staying the night.

howls of frustration again.

Husband made two pumpkin pies and the cherry one that monster #1 insisted upon.
I've finished most of the "dressing" for tomorrow... which will have to serve as the major irritation to my m-i-l. Who only ever stuffs her birds... let me tell you where to stuff any comments dear...

ahem.

In laws are bringing nqmds birthday card with them... That way they don't have to acknowledge the fact that she does not have the same last name as the monsters and their son. Of course they have never addressed me by anything but my husbands last name. So if they bring it in instead of mailing it... no name has to be written on the envelope.

I'm peeved.

Actually, I am seething. But that is beside the point.

Must try and get some sleep... If I've got them for more than a few hours... I'm gonna need some rest.

*Oh Sarah you have no idea how much I want to serve a tofu bird to them.... Actually does not sound that bad to me. I LOVE the dressing/stuffing... I'd feel okay stuffing tofu! =)

Happy Thanksgiving...

Or more aptly put by my massage therapist...
Turkey slaughtering day. *I'm sure the word innocent was in there somewhere
Yup, we at the monster house are going to cook a rather large bird (thawing in fridge at the moment).
Smash some yams.
Vegetables both warm and cold.
Make dressing (on the stove/in the oven NOT in the birdie).
If I feel like it, sour dough buns from the sourdough starter I made.
Make Pumpkin and Cherry pie (Monster #1 insisted on Cherry pie).
Whipping cream, the real stuff.

Oh yes, and of course the in-laws who just happened to think they'd come by on the weekend....

Let the games begin..........

THIS is so tempting to serve to the "meat and potatoes" in-laws
ugh

My, how I've changed? !

Haven't been to blogthings lately..
And after reading the horrific neighbour post on mimilou, I kept going to the last time I had visited her site.... found this one. Thanks for the link Jenn I do feel a little better about our neighbours, as whacked out as they are! Yes, I counted. If it happens again I'm going to freak on the little buggers. I'm done with the fundraising stuff already!

You've Changed 40% in 10 Years

Ah, the past! You may not remember it well - because you're still living in it. While you've changed some, you may want to update your wardrobe, music collection and circle of friends.

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

Updated the wardrobe a bit last week....
Music collection, yeah because husband doesn't break the bank every time he even walks by a music store?!
Circle of friends? I've got one from ten years ago. ONE! Yeesh!

An open letter to the children of the neighborhood.

Is my home on fire?
Is the home next to this one on fire?
Is your home on fire?
Are you, yourself on fire?

Is there a bully chasing you?
Is a bully chasing one of your friends?
Are you a bully scared of getting caught, so you are at my door?

Is the racoon in sight?
I was under assumption it was caught on the day it wandered into the area.
Is there a rabid animal chasing you?
Is there an animal that is chasing you?
Are you scared of the squirrel and want us to not continue to feed it peanuts?

Then do not ring my doorbell seventeen times in sucession.

-and no I do not want to buy the same fundraising thing that they are expecting my Kindergarten son to sell too!

grumble

Life has officially gone to hell in a handbasket.

This is quote taken out of context... it wasn't directed directly at me... but at all this persons friends, family and anyone else who knows what is going on in their world...

"I don't give a shit if you believe in God or not -
pray- my kids need a Dad"

This is what is sticking in my head from an e-mail I got tonight.
Not the news of the kids.
Not anything else...

I am getting a really nasty vocabulary. I don't know how else to get those emotions out...

So, yes... I'm going to pray. And I want someone to listen to me!

GRUMBLE!!!!

My phone bill has been paid.
My cell phone bill has been paid.


Neither of them are working?!
YET... the internet is?


I am so not impressed.


Husband is driving me insane. He threw out a whole bunch of my books, papers and other "odds and ends" while I was gone yesterday. Just so I wouldn't do the whole "but I needed that" thing to him.
Thanks for telling me what I do and do not need in my life sweetie. I'll remember that the next time I come across your coin and stamp collection.... I'm waiting for that "I really don't like being around you" feeling to go away. It isn't getting much better after that stunt.

Not impressed at all.

It's enough to make my ovaries ache...

Just a smidgen... you know?

Aren't they GORGEOUS?!