Good day! Bad day!

*emotional rant and oodles of tears in this post. And No, I don't want to get into it dear friends who have my phone #... I'm sure this is just hormonal hell compounded by way too much sadness, sirens and anger.

M1 had a great day at school... not sure which deity to thank for that... but
Thanks all! Don't know what we are doing right... but I will do my best to keep it up... whatever it is!
Md is on a rampage of fits... seems that she is taking over for her missing brother today. I'm tired of fits. But at least it is only one and not two at a time. right? She wallops her forehead on the ground when she gets frustrated now... just to think m2 was this age when I was in the final weeks of pregnancy. Makes me wonder just how I survived!
Have wasted time trying to write some more stuff. Just can't seem to help erasing it all...
does that make sense? nah... okay... well ignore me then.
I'm so tired though. Not just physically, but emotionally. I'm just tired of trying to make things work. Why can't things be easy? I know that I've made mistakes in my life and choices I've made over the years... who hasn't? But c'mon. I need a break or something.
No, this isn't about the funeral on Thursday. I was contacted by someone "looking into matters" today. My e-mail address came up. I started to panic. Did I ever encourage her to UC? I'm sure I didn't. This hunch was validated by the "person in charge"... they just wanted to know if I was there, or in contact with her during the labour and delivery. I guess she phoned the house, but never left a message. I wasn't even in the city when baby was born.
You know. I have no right to be such a selfish little whiner right now. That couple, despite a crash c/s three years ago... came home with empty arms. Again last week... their arms are empty. What kind of world is this? What a sick, cruel world. To add insult to their sorrow... the "authorities" have to "investigate".

Yo God! Today. You suck.
Sincerely the mom to monsters