Late night conversations at the monster house...

Husband: So, we should go to South Dakota in August after camp.
Mom to monsters: No can do.
H: We won't need passports yet.
mm: still no can do.
H:It won't be that bad, at least two will be toilet trained! It will be fun.
mm: No.
H: I don't understand why you are so against us going anywhere and doing anything... rant rave, getting grouchier by the second.

silence...
radio static white noise picks up neighbours cell phone conversation.... briefly enjoy the x-rated call from his girlfriend... back to static.

H: Well, so long as it isn't you who is pregnant. Fine. No trips in August...
mm: Glad you caught on.
H: Do I have to move out with the kids?
mm: I'll let you know.
H: The friend North or the one South?
mm: I'm not at liberty to say...

thinking he'd fallen asleep...

H: do I get paid for being on call for childcare?

mm smacks him and tells him to shut up and go to sleep.